The most-celebrated moment of Thursday's (8/28) MTV Video Music Awards--which aired on a channel that now spends far more time broadcasting the real-life sexual exploits of 20-somethings than it does showing music videos--also had nothing to do with music videos and everything to do with titillation.

That moment, as MTV's own MTVNews.com helpfully points out, was a "shocking opening performance" that "overshadowed ... the actual awards" with the "steamy sight of Madonna [ tickets ] kissing Britney Spears [ tickets ] and Christina Aguilera [ tickets ]."

Oh, and they also sang.

The network amplified the well-choreographed move's exploitation factor by quickly cutting to a seemingly genuine reaction shot of Britney's ex-beau Justin Timberlake [ tickets ], who looked on stoically while the rest of the audience whooped in delight.

Missy Elliott subsequently joined the three divas for the remainder of the performance, but she was the only one among the four who returned to the stage to pick up Moonman trophies.

Elliott, who in previous years had walked away empty handed despite racking up 17 nominations, took the top honor of the night when her "Work It" video was crowned Video of the Year. The clip, which was vying for eight awards, also scored a win in the Best Hip-Hop Video category.

Beyoncé and 50 Cent chalked up a pair of wins as well, with Beyoncé's "Crazy in Love" winning Best R&B Video and Best Choreography, and 50's "In Da Club" pulling down Best New Artist and Best Rap Video.

It was Timberlake and Coldplay [ tickets ] who were the night's big winners, however, with a final tally of three trophies apiece. Timberlake's "Cry Me a River" won in the Best Male Video, Best Pop Video and Best Dance Video categories, while Coldplay's "The Scientist" took Best Group Video, Breakthrough Video and Best Direction.

Country legend Johnny Cash, who earned an unlikely spot in the proceedings thanks to the critically acclaimed video for his remake of Nine Inch Nails' "Hurt," notched his only win in the Best Cinematography in a Video category, one of six categories in which he was nominated. (The ailing 71-year-old singer, who had hoped to attend the event, was hospitalized on Monday (8/25) due to a stomach condition.)

Other single-trophy winners included Eminem, whose "Lose Yourself" took Best Video from a Film; Good Charlotte, whose "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous" landed the Viewer's Choice Award; Linkin Park, whose "Somewhere I Belong" won Best Rock Video; and AFI, who picked up the viewer-determined MTV2 Award.

More captivating than the award presentations were the night's many live performances, which, following the Madonna-Britney-Christina orgy, included Good Charlotte's "The Anthem" (during which guitarist Benji planted a kiss on bassist Paul's cheek); Aguilera's "Dirrty" and "Fighter" medley (which also featured Redman and Dave Navarro); 50 Cent's "P.I.M.P." (with Snoop Dogg); Mary J. Blige's "Ooh!" (with 50 Cent); Coldplay's "The Scientist"; and Beyoncé's "Baby Boy" and "Crazy in Love" medley (with Jay-Z).

Metallica delivered the night's final performance, which featured an uncharacteristic instrumental medley of songs that paid tribute to MTV's 20th anniversary; excerpts included Lenny Kravitz's "Are You Gonna Go My Way," Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit," the White Stripes' "Seven Nation Army" and Michael Jackson's "Beat It." The metal veterans then performed "Frantic," the second single from their latest album, "St. Anger."

Host Chris Rock, who two years ago made waves with an opening monologue that soundly skewered many of the celebrities that MTV thrives upon, didn't disappoint this time around; the comedian poked fun at Timberlake, P. Diddy, Paula Abdul, DMX and others, and even took aim at MTV itself.

"We're here for the MTV Video Music Awards," he said, "but those of us who watch MTV know that MTV don't really show that many videos!"

2003 MTV Video Music Awards Winners

Video Of The Year
Missy "Misdemeanor" Elliott, "Work It"

Best Male Video
Justin Timberlake, "Cry Me a River"

Best Female Video
Beyonce f/ Jay-Z, "Crazy in Love"

Best New Artist In A Video
50 Cent, "In Da Club"

Breakthrough Video
Coldplay, "The Scientist"

Best Group Video
Coldplay, "The Scientist"

Best Rap Video
50 Cent, "In Da Club"

Best R&B Video
Beyonce f/ Jay-Z, "Crazy in Love"

Best Hip-Hop Video
Missy "Misdemeanor" Elliott, "Work It"

Best Dance Video
Justin Timberlake, "Rock Your Body"

Best Rock Video
Linkin Park, "Somewhere I Belong"

Best Pop Video
Justin Timberlake, "Cry Me a River"

Best Video from a Film
Eminem, "Lose Yourself" ("8 Mile")

Best Direction in a Video
Coldplay (Director: Jamie Thraves), "The Scientist"

Best Choreography in a Video
Beyonce f/ Jay-Z, "Crazy in Love"

Best Special Effects in a Video
Queens of the Stone Age, "Go With the Flow"

Best Art Direction in a Video
Radiohead, "There There"

Best Editing in a Video
The White Stripes, "Seven Nation Army"

Best Cinematography in a Video
Johnny Cash, "Hurt"

MTV2 Award
A.F.I., "Girl's Not Grey"

Viewer's Choice
Good Charlotte, "Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous"